The one sentence you hear alot on friendship is the following..."I Promise...Ill Never Cut You Off...
The question is...do we mean it when we say it? I think alot of us hope we do, but then when it comes to the actual situation, can we live with those words? or have we heard it so many times that when someone who means it, actually says it, it doesnt instil any strength of belief?
The other question is...how can we actually prove this to someone, until they push our buttons so much so, that we question this sentence ourselves. I put myself in that situation recently, bad week, bad day, frustrations and an eventual arguement. The arguement led to the end of a friendship, the other party used this type of sentence in their defence. That is a fair statement, they did not believe the integrity of the statement and obviously felt that I would never be able to keep that bargain. It was a very sad sad afternoon, I stared at the mirror and felt like banging my head on the wall. It didnt help, I think I sms'd and called them enough times to be considered a freaking stalker. *Note, generally calling a call 5-10 times in about 30mins and smsing 10+ times would easily qualify you for a stalker tag.
The frustration is, when you cancel on someone due to frustrations or you re-schedule, at what point is that considering cutting them off? In my own views and experiences it is simply an isolated annoyance amongst a multitude of positives. So why do they react this way, as if the world has ended?
I have not really managed to understand this mindset, perhaps I do not like to recognise it, or perhaps I have not given it enough time. One must understand how their previous experiences played out. Did someone cancel once, then cancel again, over and over until they walked away? Did they cancel once and then walk away? Who knows.
Is it smart to pre-emptively strike? and destroy a strong friendship? In some circumstances yes, in others no. I guess the question is, how confident do you feel in what you other the other party.
In this case I feel I offer more than anyone else, however there is a situation where the other parties fears and frustrations and memories overpower what you offer and you cannot find the meeting point to talk. At times one party may question the value within a friendship, this can be frustrating when options are given for them to display this, but their fears push them away.
What a confusing sentence. I need to ponder this.
